The noble queen and the boundless sky

At long last, a day off. I spend most of it with Akasavajri, enjoying time to call my own. We talk a little bit more about the future. We both contact our fears and have a go at voicing them to each other. I am encouraged by this process and somehow rather than keep fear locked away, I feel we've given fear a chance to breathe. What follows from this is the unfolding of a space for love and faith to emerge between us and have a go at breathing too.

When I return home to the community, Abhilasa welcomes me as if I am a stately queen that has been thrown a returning home party. I feel like a queen as I contact the warmth and friendship that our appeal team has already managed to cultivate between us. I feel grateful for this, it makes so much difference when I'm getting ready in the evenings to go out on the doors, and also when I'm actually out there, knowing that they are too.

Before we head out I find myself expressing my resistance again. Abhilasa gathers us all around and we do a couple of visualisations, and then we do the "Earth Goddess" ritual. We stand in a circle around each other, one person in the centre, and we contact the earth energy then scoop it up with both hands and heap it on the person in the middle. We do this and take turns in the middle and at the end we all feel refreshed, full of energy, earthed and bonded as a group. Paddy says that now he feels like a complete hippy. We giggle at him, and I ask everyone for a group hug. We do this, and now it is confirmed we are all hippies. Naomi later remarks that we're like this Benetton advert doing hippy things together, diverse bunch that we are. We are still struggling to find a name for our appeal - something that bonds us together, we decide to sleep on it.

I walk down a "rich street" in Kentish Town. The first householder tries to swot me away like a fly or a lowly servant. I am a match for him though, having had training with Khemajala yesterday on "matching energy" - I match him and our conversation almost has a flavour of confrontation. Without knowing how he managed it the householder takes a booklet from me, and I agree to go back and see him next week. When I return to the pavement, I realise that this street is going to have the energy of the financially rich on it, who are sometimes very adept at dismissing door to door fundraisers. I steel myself, hold myself up straight, head held high, contact the noble queen in me, and think of Vandanajyoti and how she would fundraise this street. I set off on my noble quest. It goes pretty well. I decide to try wearing a smart shirt tomorrow in order to feel more the part.

When I get home there are drinks, crisps and a large chocolate cake on the table. Stevie Wonder is playing in the background, and Abhilasa is playing host for Adarsha's birthday party. Naomi has baked a cake which is gluten free and vegan (such are our team's dietary restrictions). The cake looks and tastes amazing, Paddy says it's the best he's ever tasted. We sing happy birthday, Paddy puts on his red dress and we dance to the tunes, and generally have a good old giggle. We draw pictures on our scoreboard and try to make it look creative and inviting, none of us got any standing orders tonight. Patience appears to be the name of the game. Khemajala and Adarsha remark that whenever they see us we always look like we're having this amazingly good time together, even though we're on appeal. We all grin and don't quite know how to answer that.